About Common Ground Mediation

Built from Lived
Experience, Not Just Training

Common Ground Mediation is a modern, boutique mediation practice founded in North County San Diego, built for LGBT couples, modern families, and anyone navigating difficult transitions in a calmer, more human, and more structured way.

Our Story

Built from lived experience,
not just training.

Built from lived experience, not just training.

Common Ground Mediation was founded by Nicole Oliva after more than a decade navigating high-conflict, high-stakes interpersonal disputes as a federal EEO investigator. In that role, Nicole handled workplace discrimination claims, sensitive interpersonal conflicts, and cases where the emotional and professional stakes were as high as they get. She learned to stay neutral under pressure, ask the questions others avoided, and help people feel genuinely heard — even when communication had completely broken down.

But the decision to launch Common Ground wasn't just professional. It was deeply personal. Nicole has navigated marriage, divorce, remarriage, IVF, blended family dynamics, and a major life relocation all while building a new chapter. She understands firsthand the emotional, financial, and relational weight that modern couples carry during periods of major transition. She also understands the LGBT experience from the inside as someone who has personally lived through the joys and complications of same-sex partnership, fertility treatment, and modern family building.

That lived perspective is what drove her to Pepperdine's Straus Institute for Dispute Resolution one of the most respected mediation programs in the country where she earned her Master of Dispute Resolution alongside a Master of Legal Studies from the Caruso School of Law. What she found there confirmed what she already knew from experience: that conflict, when approached with the right structure and the right guide, doesn't have to end in destruction.

Common Ground exists because too many modern couples, especially LGBT couples, non-traditional families, and millennial partners navigating fertility treatments such as IVF and all that comes with that such as donor choices and embryo decisions, pets, finances, or co-parenting, feel unseen by the traditional legal system. The practice is intentionally built to be different: warmer, more flexible, more emotionally aware, and more aligned with the realities of how people actually build and unwind their lives today.

"Conflict does not always have to end in destruction. With the right structure and the right guidance, people can move through even the most difficult situations with clarity, understanding, and dignity." Nicole Oliva, Founder, Common Ground Mediation"

Our Vision

A World Where Conflict Does Not Have to Mean Destruction

We envision a world where individuals, couples, and families have access to a conflict resolution process that is as emotionally intelligent as it is structurally sound. One that honors the complexity of real relationships and the dignity of every person sitting at the table.

We believe that the mediation process, when done well, does not just resolve disputes. It improves communication, rebuilds trust, and creates a foundation for healthier and more sustainable relationships going forward, whether those relationships continue or come to a close.

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Our Mission

Guiding People Through Difficult Situations with Structure and Care

Common Ground Mediation provides modern, emotionally intelligent conflict resolution services for LGBT couples, modern families, and individuals navigating high-conflict situations including separation, divorce, co-parenting disputes, IVF-related decisions, and difficult communication breakdowns in San Diego and across Southern California.

Our mission is to offer a calmer, more collaborative alternative to adversarial legal proceedings. One that keeps people informed, empowered, and in control of their own outcomes. We do this by combining rigorous dispute resolution training with genuine empathy, flexible process design, and a real commitment to each client's long-term well-being.

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Credentials & Affiliations

Education, Training, and Professional Memberships

Master of Dispute Resolution

Pepperdine University Straus Institute for Dispute Resolution. One of the most respected conflict resolution programs in the United States, with focused training in mediation, negotiation, and high-conflict communication.

Master of Legal Studies

Pepperdine University Caruso School of Law. Building a strong foundation in legal reasoning, critical analysis, and navigating the US legal system with an ethical and structured lens throughout the mediation process.

Former Federal EEO Investigator

Prior to founding Common Ground Mediation, Nicole served as a federal EEO investigator handling sensitive, high-conflict workplace disputes, discrimination allegations, and interpersonal matters requiring strict professional neutrality.

Southern California Mediation Association

Nicole is an active member of the Southern California Mediation Association, a professional body committed to advancing mediation practice and maintaining high standards of ethics, neutrality, and professional conduct across the region.

Community Practice and Outreach

Nicole is actively engaged in San Diego's LGBT community and broader modern family network, offering community mediation programs, anti-bullying workshops, and teen conflict resolution services alongside her private practice.

Our Team

The People Behind Common Ground Mediation

Every person at Common Ground brings care, expertise, and a genuine commitment to helping clients navigate difficult situations with dignity.

Nicole Oliva

Founder & Lead Mediator

MDR & MLS, Pepperdine University. Former Federal EEO Investigator. Specializes in LGBT couples, IVF-related mediation, and high-conflict family dynamics.

Coming Soon

Co-Parenting Specialist

Focused on parenting plan development, custody support, and communication facilitation for families navigating separation.

Coming Soon

Workplace Conflict Consultant

Supporting executives, teams, and small businesses in navigating interpersonal dynamics and communication breakdowns.

Coming Soon

Teen & Community Mediator

Dedicated to parent-teen conflict, peer mediation programs, and anti-bullying workshops in schools and community settings.

Nicole Oliva

Founder and CEO, Common Ground Mediation San Diego

Nicole Oliva founded Common Ground Mediation to fill a gap she personally experienced and professionally recognized. She holds dual Master's degrees from Pepperdine University in Dispute Resolution and Legal Studies, and brings years of high-conflict federal investigation experience into every mediation session. She specializes in LGBT couple mediation, IVF and fertility-related conflict resolution, co-parenting disputes, and modern family transitions across San Diego and Southern California. Nicole is personally rooted in the communities she serves and approaches every session with the same core commitment: helping real people move through genuinely difficult situations with structure, neutrality, and care.

Jen Segura

Family Mediator

I have always had a strong passion and desire to work with families. I am sure some of this desire came from my upbringing, which was not terrible, but definitely strained. We moved a lot when I was young, and I was in a different school for each new school year.

Our Core Values

The Values That Guide Every Session at Common Ground Mediation

These are not words on a wall. They are the principles that shape how every conversation, every session, and every
agreement at Common Ground Mediation is handled.

Neutrality

Equal voice. No sides. No pressure.

True neutrality means every person in the room receives equal space, equal respect, and equal access to the process. At Common Ground Mediation, neither party is favored, rushed, or dismissed. The mediator's role is to hold the process steady so both parties can do the real work of reaching resolution together.

Empathy

Understanding the human behind the conflict.

Conflict is rarely just about the issue on the table. People come to mediation carrying stress, grief, fear, and uncertainty. Empathy at Common Ground means acknowledging that reality honestly and structuring every session to meet people where they actually are, not where a rigid process assumes they should be.

Integrity

Honest, transparent, and accountable — always.

Every commitment made at Common Ground Mediation is honored. That means honest communication about what mediation can and cannot do, clear boundaries around the process, transparent pricing, and a consistent focus on what is genuinely best for the people involved rather than what is easiest or most convenient.

Confidentiality

What's shared here stays here — completely.

Privacy is not just a feature of the mediation process. It is a promise. Everything discussed in a Common Ground Mediation session remains fully confidential. Clients can speak openly, share honestly, and work through even the most sensitive topics knowing that the conversation stays entirely within the room.

Certifications,Associations,Guarantee

Real San Diego Clients. Real Results.

“Nicole was the first person who made us feel like we could actually slow down and work through things instead of just fighting about them. She didn't talk over us or make us feel stupid for not understanding the process. She took the time to explain things in a way that actually made sense, helped us break overwhelming issues into smaller pieces, and made us feel more involved and empowered in the decisions we were making instead of feeling pushed into them.

What stood out most was that she genuinely cared about helping us create solutions that worked for our real life, not just what looked good on paper. The process felt calm, private, structured, and human during one of the hardest periods of our lives.”

Verified Client, Separation and Co-Parenting Mediation, Southern California

"Nicole was the first person who made us feel like we could actually slow down and work through things instead of just fighting about them. The process felt calm, private, structured, and human during one of the hardest periods of our lives."

Verified Client, Separation and Co-Parenting Mediation, Southern California

"As an LGBT couple, we were not sure if a mediator would truly understand our specific situation. Nicole did without us having to over-explain. She got it from the start. That made the entire process so much easier."

Verified Client, LGBT Couple Separation, San Diego

"We had already spoken with two attorneys and felt more overwhelmed after each conversation. Nicole helped us step back, focus on what actually mattered, and make decisions we both felt good about. We saved thousands of dollars and so much stress."

Verified Client, Divorce Mediation, San Diego, California

"The process felt calm, private, structured, and human during one of the hardest periods of our lives. She helped us find common ground."

— Verified Client, Southern California

Ready to Find Common Ground?

Start a Conversation with a San Diego Mediator You Can Actually Trust

A free, no-pressure consultation is the easiest way to find out if mediation is right for your situation. Nicole will talk through where things stand, answer your questions honestly, and figure out the best path forward together.

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